Every summer at Rising Star has a theme that is chosen and described by the coordinators. This year our theme is "It's All About Love". When I first arrived here at Rising Star, I thought the theme was cute and was a good choice. However now, as I sit here with only one week left in this unbelievable summer, our theme has become a deep reminder of some of the most important lessons I have learned here.
I love the kids and staff of Rising Star. You guys already know this. I am obsessed with them. They make me laugh and cry. They teach me about joy and pain and life and love. They push me to give more, to love more, to do more, and to teach more. They need so much love, and I am constantly stretched to open my heart a little more, give a few more hugs, spend a little more time. I have given more in this summer than I could ever have imagined. However, no matter how much I gave or continue to give, it could never measure up to what I have received here in India. Every single one of those kids has so much love to give. They have so much light and so much energy. Their weird little sayings and adorable mannerisms leave me with a permanent smile and a light heart. Their resilience has humbled me in ways I could not have anticipated. They have taught me how to see joy and light. They have helped me to understand that it's okay to love openly, enormously, instantaneously, and unconditionally.
I love the volunteers that I am here with. I love the constant stream of short term volunteers that have cycled through here this summer. There have been some absolutely incredible people around and they have taught me so much. However, I can't describe to you how much I love the long term volunteers. I have learned so many different lessons from every single one of them. Julie teaches me about overcoming trials. Callie teaches me to greet the world with a smile. Miranda teaches me to have faith. Amy teaches me to love more purely. Danielle teaches me about willingness to serve. Carl teaches me to enjoy each day. Dane teaches me to be adventurous. Celina teaches me to work as hard as I can. Brenda teaches me to be organized. Sarah teaches me to be creative. I truly believe that one of the biggest reasons I was supposed to be at Rising Star now is because of them. They are the greatest Rising Star family members I could have asked for.
I love my family. I have, hands down, the greatest family in the entire world. Their encouragement and support keeps me going and helps me remember why I'm here. I have been stunned and overwhelmed by their interest in what I'm doing here. I feel an intense sense of gratitude and joy whenever one of my family members tells me they want to sponsor one of these kiddos. I'm so grateful that they are so accepting and understanding of this place and these people that I have fallen in love with. I can't tell you, family, how much it means to me that you are trying to love these people that I love. As sad as I will be to leave Rising Star, I am so excited to see my family again. They mean the whole world to me.
I have started to learn to love myself here. Often, we are our own harshest critics. That is certainly true of me. Yesterday, I was reading through some of my past blog posts, trying to summon the motivation to write some new ones, when I was so struck by how much I have changed here. My outlook on the world is completely different. I have gained some much-needed self-assurance that I am capable of doing good and hard things. I can use my hands to lift someone else. I can use my voice to comfort those who need it. I can spend my time with those who are in need of some love, who are sick, who are lonely or downtrodden. I can teach kids to read and write. I can share my experiences and pray that they will be meaningful to someone. I have the capacity to contribute to our world in positive ways. I may never be Mother Theresa, but I can do my small part to help those who need it.
Finally, I have gained a love for my Heavenly Father here in India. I can't imagine being in this harsh place and not believing that there is something bigger than this existence. I have had so many experiences here in India where I have felt helpless or inadequate. No matter how long I hold the hand of a person who has lost everything because of leprosy, I can never bring back the life they lost. No matter how long I hold a child, I can never erase the pains of their past or prevent the pains they may face in the future. In these moments, I realize the only thing left to do is to turn it over to God. I know, now, what they mean when they say His grace is sufficient. He is the only one who can fix it. He is the only one that can truly comfort their hearts when they lie down at night. I have learned that, after I have done all I can to help, I have to trust in Him to fill in the pieces. I am forever indebted to the people I have met here that have taught me that lesson. I can't wait for the day that they will be made whole in every way by Christ. They are the sweetest souls and I continually pray that they will feel God's love for them.
Thank you all for reading this long post. India is amazing. I can't describe it, I can't capture it in pictures. I'm so grateful to all of you for supporting me and trying to understand my jumbled thoughts. You are all my rock. I love you.
I love the kids and staff of Rising Star. You guys already know this. I am obsessed with them. They make me laugh and cry. They teach me about joy and pain and life and love. They push me to give more, to love more, to do more, and to teach more. They need so much love, and I am constantly stretched to open my heart a little more, give a few more hugs, spend a little more time. I have given more in this summer than I could ever have imagined. However, no matter how much I gave or continue to give, it could never measure up to what I have received here in India. Every single one of those kids has so much love to give. They have so much light and so much energy. Their weird little sayings and adorable mannerisms leave me with a permanent smile and a light heart. Their resilience has humbled me in ways I could not have anticipated. They have taught me how to see joy and light. They have helped me to understand that it's okay to love openly, enormously, instantaneously, and unconditionally.
I love the volunteers that I am here with. I love the constant stream of short term volunteers that have cycled through here this summer. There have been some absolutely incredible people around and they have taught me so much. However, I can't describe to you how much I love the long term volunteers. I have learned so many different lessons from every single one of them. Julie teaches me about overcoming trials. Callie teaches me to greet the world with a smile. Miranda teaches me to have faith. Amy teaches me to love more purely. Danielle teaches me about willingness to serve. Carl teaches me to enjoy each day. Dane teaches me to be adventurous. Celina teaches me to work as hard as I can. Brenda teaches me to be organized. Sarah teaches me to be creative. I truly believe that one of the biggest reasons I was supposed to be at Rising Star now is because of them. They are the greatest Rising Star family members I could have asked for.
I love my family. I have, hands down, the greatest family in the entire world. Their encouragement and support keeps me going and helps me remember why I'm here. I have been stunned and overwhelmed by their interest in what I'm doing here. I feel an intense sense of gratitude and joy whenever one of my family members tells me they want to sponsor one of these kiddos. I'm so grateful that they are so accepting and understanding of this place and these people that I have fallen in love with. I can't tell you, family, how much it means to me that you are trying to love these people that I love. As sad as I will be to leave Rising Star, I am so excited to see my family again. They mean the whole world to me.
I have started to learn to love myself here. Often, we are our own harshest critics. That is certainly true of me. Yesterday, I was reading through some of my past blog posts, trying to summon the motivation to write some new ones, when I was so struck by how much I have changed here. My outlook on the world is completely different. I have gained some much-needed self-assurance that I am capable of doing good and hard things. I can use my hands to lift someone else. I can use my voice to comfort those who need it. I can spend my time with those who are in need of some love, who are sick, who are lonely or downtrodden. I can teach kids to read and write. I can share my experiences and pray that they will be meaningful to someone. I have the capacity to contribute to our world in positive ways. I may never be Mother Theresa, but I can do my small part to help those who need it.
Finally, I have gained a love for my Heavenly Father here in India. I can't imagine being in this harsh place and not believing that there is something bigger than this existence. I have had so many experiences here in India where I have felt helpless or inadequate. No matter how long I hold the hand of a person who has lost everything because of leprosy, I can never bring back the life they lost. No matter how long I hold a child, I can never erase the pains of their past or prevent the pains they may face in the future. In these moments, I realize the only thing left to do is to turn it over to God. I know, now, what they mean when they say His grace is sufficient. He is the only one who can fix it. He is the only one that can truly comfort their hearts when they lie down at night. I have learned that, after I have done all I can to help, I have to trust in Him to fill in the pieces. I am forever indebted to the people I have met here that have taught me that lesson. I can't wait for the day that they will be made whole in every way by Christ. They are the sweetest souls and I continually pray that they will feel God's love for them.
Thank you all for reading this long post. India is amazing. I can't describe it, I can't capture it in pictures. I'm so grateful to all of you for supporting me and trying to understand my jumbled thoughts. You are all my rock. I love you.
I love you, B. Proud of you as always.
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